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Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Time has finally come to a regular pace for me, thank god! I have become used to the hustle and bustle of my division, bless them for giving such a post. I think, in two more lessons, I would be finished with my first Japanese course and shall not make the same mistake of scheduling it in Wednesday LOL, that way I can finally my dearly missed peeps at SCC. I want to go back and find the same atmosphere, welcoming, accepting. I really hope. I really do.

My father asked me why not put the classes during weekends. Like hell no, weekends at this point of time in my life is absolutely essential to me. Without it, I would be a social outcast. I already having problems scheduling my time between my major cliques being my gamer girlfriends (Clara, Eileen & Nazira), my SCC peeps (which may or may not include avier & meihar, of which I treat as a totally different category), my crazy poly friends, whom until now I have not met up with them since THAT painful incident LOL and finally ATT25. I insist on fixing this part of my life. That being said, I have two major events coming up. *mental note*

I know I've been talking about this in my blog for years on end ever since the beginning, but people around me change. They actually can find THAT extra happiness, people who I least expect themselves to become attached ARE attached. That is heartwarming and saddening and angry at the same time. Heartwarming coz I am truly happy for them coz they have been waiting a long time for it. Saddening coz...well, yea it spells itself out. Angry coz some people have been emotional about getting attached and act all "im so pityful come comfort me" and suddenly when they are attached I see that part TOTALLY disappear. Were you genuinely sad or were you trying to get attention? Oh doesn't matter anymore I guess, I think I admit I'm a little jealous.

And don't say "You'll find it", I don't believe in bullshit like that. You say that coz you're already happy. You found it, of course you'll think it will happen. Bleh I'm being a total bitch now.




That because...I had the most saddest dream last night. Not because I was sad in my dream, rather...I dreamt I was happy. Like really happy, only to wake up feeling like shit 2am in the morning finding out...none of it was true.

Just Because
10:20 PM

QUACK

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opened: 25 July 2007 1:15AM


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