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Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Soemtimes I wonder what people think of me?

I, for one, think that I'm way too...how you put it? Obliviously arrogant...yeah that fits in quite nicely. The problem with me is that I have a HUGE HUGE HUGE habit of not looking at people when I talk with them or even say "hi" to people I know. I have done this to a lot of people and I'm very ashamed of it. I leaves a really bad aftertaste in your mouth that you can't take out or forget unless someone overwrites the feeling with a horrendous dirty joke about scat fetishes or something like that. I hate myself largely because of that.

Example, this happens to three of my lecturers already and I'm slowly getting a bad vibe from them. One of them, after subsequent staring at me while I move past him, started to ignore me the same way as I did with him the next time I had enough courage to wave or smile. Luckily, we managed to converse quite casually minah-izing someone in class. Phew.

Another case was also similar to the one above. This time it was because I was so stricken with guilt and shame, so much that I don't have courage to look at his face and smile or greet him. It's sickening to have that disgusting aftertaste after you see him passing you by inevitably along the corridors.

I have done that to aquiantances too. I shall not delve in the details but what I can say is I never really got to know them thoroughly in the first place so I have that thinking that I don't really have any obligation to say "hi" to him. I'm that kind of person if the other party says Hi, I would most definitely say Hi back cheerfully. Problem is, most others think that way too.

Just Because
6:43 PM

QUACK

http://kur0s4wa.blogspot.com
opened: 25 July 2007 1:15AM


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