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Thursday, March 23, 2006

Yesterday I was sitting in my bed and crying early in the morning...because of certain recent events that got me to a whole new level of depression. Im not one of those kind who displays their depression and problems to the whole world just because they need the attention, because i learnt one very important thing last year, is that no one and i repeat NO ONE will pity you unless they have a motive. It may sound paranoid, but yeah. Its true.

So i got in to the second round of auditions, so what? So i can assume i have talent? Bullshit. Ever since i got through the first round i had that certain mindset that my voice was special after all. I used that as a base to build up my confidence throughout the preparation of the second round. It had such an impact on me, that I, Orewa, Ben Ren, Yours Truly had talent. Face it, jiayi. You Don't Have Talent. You dont have what it takes, therefore you must practise doubly hard. Well, that's what i didnt do. Guess where that put me.

My song choice was so last-minute i had already begun to regret it when i stepped out of the audition room. Now i hate the song. I will NEVER sing that song again, ever. Or the second song, or the third song. I just couldnt bring myself to sing it again. I wanted something with a little more closer to the heart. I wanted to sing deep soul. Both of the schools i went to did not have any such inclination to that type of genre. Im not blaming them, but i do not prefer their type of genre. Pop, what an overused word. R&B, most irritating word to be used just so they wanted to be cool. Oh COME ON, the Rhythm & Blues does not americanize you. Remember, there is a "BLues" word in there. What the hell do you know about The Blues? I bet you dont know peanuts. At least i know a tiny bit that The Blues, Soul and the like can never be taught.

I dont get the satisfaction of singing chinese songs or certain pop songs, i guess they are just shallow. I want to sing someting that after every phrase, in my mind i will be saying: "Yeah, i felt something there. It actually made me happy/sad/angry" It seems like Soul does it for me.

Then again, Jiayi. you dont have talent neither do you have the voice. You are a Bass. A vocal failure, you range is like freakin crappy. An E3 to a E5? No one wants a bass in the entertainment industry.

Just Because
9:35 PM

QUACK

http://kur0s4wa.blogspot.com
opened: 25 July 2007 1:15AM


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